With every day I pass through

I look at my paperwork

And wonder if this is regret

 

I have mountains of things to do

Amounting to my worth

What was it that I said

 

My dream is to stand up at Madison Square

Me, my guitar, and a band

Even if I don’t have anyone there

All I’d need is a microphone stand

 

But here I sit one more time in my bed

Writing out my pain

No one can hear the song in my head

Nobody knows my name

 

I look up at the superstars

Jealous of the power in their voices

The black hole is eating at my heart

And I can’t stop           crying

 

I look at the stuff around me

Always second-guessing my choices

Trying to be what I said I’d be

But I can’t stop                  thinking of dying

 

What did I promise myself

I could trade in one dream

I could write all these papers for life

It’s not like I don’t have help

There is nothing stopping me

I am just wasting my time

 

My dream was to stand at Madison Square

Be the diva I am

Belt out my drama, lay everything bare

All I need is a microphone stand

 

But here I ache, mourning my dreams again

Knowing I won’t leave the ground

I have all this yearning and music in my head

But I cannot make a sound

 

I look up at the superstars

Jealous of the power in their voices

The black hole is eating at my heart

And I can’t stop                 crying

 

I look at the stuff around me

Always second-guessing my choices

Trying to be what I said I’d be

But I can’t stop                  thinking of dying

 

I know, I know what I did wrong

That doesn’t mean I can stop      crying

When I can’t even sing this song

I write for the diva I am not

I am soft

 

I convince myself to crush my dreams

Leave my feelings in the dust

I told myself to end my misery

I know my voice is not enough

I know myself and what might seem

Like everything that I love

 

I can distract myself        with all this stuff

But I know what it means

I hate myself                      for giving up

on me

 

I look up at the superstars

Jealous of the power in their voices

The black hole is eating at my heart

And I can’t stop                 crying

 

I look at the stuff around me

Always second-guessing my choices

Trying to be what I said I’d be

But I can’t stop                  thinking of dying

 

I know, I know what I did wrong

That doesn’t mean I can stop      crying

When I can’t even sing this song

I write for the diva I am not

I am soft

 

In my head my voice can handle the *

But when I sing it sounds more like **

I am soft

 

 

*Belt run in mixed voice

** Repeat run in head voice or falsetto, blemished